My Top Five Choices For GOP Presidential Candidate

A Democrat chooses the ideal GOP nominee, in order of Preference, out of those who have a chance to get the nomination…

#1, my top preference: I’d love it if somehow Sarah Palin got the nomination. Because there’s not a chance in Hell she’d win, even if in some places the local GOP operatives tamper with the votes. Too many rational Republicans–and there are some–would just stay home that day. Imagine her in a debate with Obama. She cannot win. So I’d love to have her get the nomination, since I want Obama re-elected (since we can’t have Bernie Sanders for the Dem nominee). Also, there’s the “dude, that’d be really entertaining” factor.

#2, Michelle Bachmann. Because she only has a slightly better chance of winning than Sarah Palin. She’s flaky, a religious nut, she’s got baggage around her husband and his use of public funds, and…imagine her, too, in a debate with Obama. Again, the rational Republicans and Independents would just stay home. Or they’d write-in their preference. Bachmann would lose against Obama. She too would have that “entertainment” factor to recommend her as the GOP choice…

#3, Mitt Romney. I prefer he get the GOP nomination over Rick Perry. The Christian-right would not uniformly unite behind a Mormon, and some GOP regard him as a health reform socialist. He has a better chance of beating Obama than Bachmann or Palin but he probably couldn’t win. He has zero charisma, and would not be able to mount any real defense during a debate, though he’d do better than the Crazy Ladies. I doubt the vote cheaters would cheat for Romney.

#4, Rick Perry. I’d rather one of the first three on my list got the GOP nomination over Perry because he might have a chance against Obama: he does have some charisma; he could draw a lot of support in the South, and he’s so evangelical/fundamentalist he’d get all the Christian conservatives on his side. Of course, he’s got baggage, he’s flaky, and he’s a knot head, so he’d probably lose in a fair fight…but if he got the nomination, Christian Rightists, who are probably the ones behind most vote-cheating, would cheat for him. (My theory is that the Republican vote cheating that goes on is principally carried out by Christian operatives manipulated by the likes of Karl Rove and the Koch Brothers–the Christian stooges of these guys believe that GAWD wants their candidate to win so that engaging in fraud is all FOR GAWD and is therefore justified. If they’re supporting one of their own, they’re more likely to rationalize voter fraud.)

#5, Jon Huntsman. My last choice. I do hope Jon Huntsman does not get the GOP nomination, because I don’t want a Republican President, and he might actually beat Obama. The problem is, he’s smart and he’s sane. He would do fairly well in a debate with Obama (he’d be wrong, but he’d argue well). He’s a personable guy, more mainstream than the other candidates, who would attract GOP moderates, perhaps some blue-dog Democrats, and a lot of Independents. He’s not an extremist, he’s fair minded–for a Republican he might make a pretty good President, sort of like Eisenhower. But I don’t want a Republican President, no matter how likable, especially during an era when so many dangerous bills from the far right need to be vetoed. The one hopeful wrinkle, if Huntsman gets chosen, is that he’s a Mormon too. That might undercut Christian support. . .I pray he doesn’t get the GOP nomination because he’s the only one with a decent chance of beating Obama. So he’s my last choice.

The dark horses: My opinion is that neither Pawlenty nor Santorum would ever get the GOP nomination, they’re just too lame and without much support. If one of them could get it, I’d prefer Santorum, as he’s got baggage, and he’s a barely-disguised lunatic. I’m sure he could never beat Obama. Pawlenty might have a thin chance at becoming President as he’s not totally wacko and he’s a little brighter than Santorum.

Oh – “What about Herman Cain?” Cain is flaky (like his pizza dough) a bozo who oppresses his employees. He will get nowhere near the GOP nomination. The Daily Intel reports: Herman Cain signed off last night’s debate with this: “A poet once said, ‘Life can be a challenge, life can seem impossible, but it’s never easy when there’s so much on the line.’” The inspirational poet?… Turns out it’s Donna Summer…she recorded it just over a decade ago as the theme song for Pok√©mon: The Movie, 2000.

Cain claimed the song was used in the Olympics. It wasn’t.

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