WIFE HAS WARNED ME NOT TO SPEAK DURING NEW STAR WARS

We’re gonna see the new Star Wars pic tomorrow, I hear it’s good despite some whiny hyper-nerd fans, and my wife has given me a sharp look as she warns me not to bitch about the following during the movie:

the one thing that annoys me about Star Wars movies in general is the Storm Troopers apparently have armor made out of eggshells, and not just because it looks that way, but because if you merely, say, sneeze at them they fall over dead. It’s the galaxy’s most useless armor. it deflects nada, nothing. Punch them, shoot them with anything, they instantly die. If they can manage it, several will die from one shot. “Fellow stormtroopers, line up so more of us can die from one blaster shot!” Also apparently their helmets are designed to make them the worst shots, the worst at aiming, in the galaxy far far away.

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