You Say You Find Yourself in an “Alternate Universe”?

It’s a fact that some physicists are investigating the idea of alternate time-lines, multiple universes, and so on, and doubtless are quietly experimenting with penetrating these cosmic options. Clearly some experiment somewhere nudged us into an alternate universe where Trump is President. The Absurdity becoming President of the USA–quite impossible in the universe I lived in last summer. (Could the scientist have been…Russian?)

I would like to offer myself and my family to be part of the crew, in the experiment that sends a group of people back into their proper, original universe. Me and my family volunteer to go. These boffins, as the British call scientists, have bungled, and they owe it to us. I call dibs, I was first to volunteer. Send me back to the real world. This one is the offspring of a perverse imagination. I reject it.

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