Your Occasional CURMUDGEON REPORT: Meet …The GRISsers

Your Occasional CURMUDGEON REPORT — look for them at intervals of grouchiness. “Today’s Report: WHO ARE THE GRISsers?”

As an increasingly grizzled old geezer, I’ve got a RIGHT. You got to get some privileges for being a grizzled geezer. The right to be a curmudgeon. Oh I’m just a curmudgeon in training. I still have some of those other thoughts– “but I’m starting to sound like the old goats I resented when I was young” and “every generation thinks every earlier generation is vile”. But I’ve got a RIGHT dagnabbit! I mean, dammit.

Today’s Curmudgeon Report’s theme: The GRIS: *Generation Rude, Ignorant and Spoiled*. GRISsers! Grissers are rude because they’re *certain* it’s completely acceptable to gawp and tap at their smartphones while someone is trying to converse with them. They expect a ride to work from their dad who gets up an hour early to take them through rush hour to their new job and instead of conversing, or even responding to questions without prodding, they fumble hypnotically at their phone. Because having to go to work “is such a Huge Sacrifice–so just leave me alone!”

They’re unaware that it’s rude. They’re integrally rude, inherently rude, because “that’s just our generation, it’s what we do, get over it”. They’re ignorant of the basic necessity of social bonding and kindness implied in ordinary interaction. (They’re also generally ignorant–some more than others–because most of them have decided that reading books is unnecessary because you can get “information” from the internet and your phones and be Even More Aware of the world.) They’re spoiled because they expect to move in with parents and re-nest more than any other generation I ever heard of did; they’re spoiled because they don’t think they have to vote, or work at getting more than superficial data on politics or ethics.

They’re spoiled because they assume that they somehow deserve being in the First World as opposed to the third world; because most of them would never ever consider doing volunteer work in their spare time; because they think they’re supposed to be able to steal other people’s intellectual property, their books and songs, from online sources, and that’s how it’s supposed to be and screw your intellectual property rights… They’re spoiled because they think that because they themselves got bored and went home, then Occupy’s ideas were “suppressed by Government Agents.” And they think that is the case purely because they read it in a meme somewhere or heard it in a youtube video…They’re spoiled because they think that they’re supposed to be able to copy and paste to “write” a term paper, and they’re supposed to be able to use laptops in class, so they can be distracted by fifty other things instead of notating the lecture…They’re GRIS.

There’s no use your saying, Shirley Curmudgeon, I know young people who aren’t like that, or “I’m a young person and I’m not like that”–those aren’t the people I’m talking about. I’m not talking about the non-rude non-ignorant non-spoiled.

I shake my cane at the GRISsers! Curmudgeons gotta right to HOWL!


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