YOU’LL CHOKE ON THIS BURGER AND LIKE IT

Life imitates satire, especially on fast-food commercials. This has been the summer of giant fast-food hamburgers, piled high with unprecedented condiments–one with onion rings on it (that one “eaten” by a very slim model who would never touch such a thing and probably spat out each bite after a take), others with enormous patties and, perhaps, lumps of fried fat in between–one commercial follows another, franchises competing for hugeness, each burger more along the lines of a skyscraper than the last. The commercials seem to visually suggest that each burger is so big as to be almost inedible.

Expect, soon, a special option: for .99 cents more an employee comes out with a special plunger, and forces the columnar mass of food whole down your throat.

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